During the revision process, which type of wording should a writer delete in a narrative essay?
Read Fatima’s paragraph.Having moved up north just last year, I experienced my first snowstorm this past winter. At first, the snow twirled gently, lightly dusting the street, cars, and trees with snowy frosting. Then, the snow became a curtain, blinding my view so that I felt cocooned from the outside world. When the snow stopped, ice coated the trees and branches clacked like chattering teeth.
Read the paragraph that Lukas is planning to include in his narrative essay.Running is my life. Beginning last summer I practiced every day from the early break of dawn until the heat of the midday sun forced me to take a break. Sipping from my bottle of icy water to keep myself hydrated, I dreamed about running a mile in under ten minutes to compete in the statewide race.
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Read the paragraph from Viktoria’s narrative essay.As I read the rules, I became even more nervous. Fifty artists had been accepted to the competition. Each artist would have just three hours to create a painting. The topic of the painting would be revealed right before the artists would be allowed to start, so there was no chance I could brainstorm ideas ahead of time.
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Read the sentence.I work at the community garden.
Read the list of items that Aditi is planning to include in her narrative essay.1. I stayed after school once to work on the monologue with a teacher.2. I learned about an audition for the spring musical at my school.3. I realized that I need to practice more if I really want a role in the future.4. I went to the audition and barely remembered all my lines.
Read the passage that Gabriel wrote for his narrative essay.Once we arrived at the local pool, I looked around to see who else was there. Normally, I would have found the kids frolicking and splashing in the water hilarious, but not today. They were cute, but the fact that they were half my age and swimming around like so many ducks just made me feel worse."You nervous?” my mom asked.I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Not really,” I mumbled, trying to hide my shaking hands in my pockets.I don’t think I fooled my mom, but she didn’t comment on the fact that I looked a little green. Instead, she tried to encourage me, saying, "Well, I think it’s really impressive that you’re going to confront your fear of water and learn to swim.”
When planning his narrative essay, should Noam include a section about how his experience affected him?
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